As you encounter the world around you, you will hear many words that go undefined. It is the task of Current Affairs to explain these terms in intelligible language, so that readers may perceive the true nature of things.
- American lives /əˈmɛrɪk(ə)n lʌɪvz/ n. the units by which the human toll of a war is measured.
- body camera /ˈbɒdi ˈkam(ə)rə/ n. a magic technology capable of turning off whenever a police officer commits a crime.
- border /ˈbɔːdə/ n. an imaginary line drawn through the world, the crossing of which is met with violence on behalf of those who may live thousands of miles away from the line.
- charity /ˈtʃarɪti/ n. organization that attempts to partially compensate for capitalism’s failures.
- charter school /ˈtʃɑːtəskuːl/ n. a school that insists it can provide better education than a public school because the people who run it are not accountable to anyone.
- corporation /kɔːpəˈreɪʃ(ə)n/ n. a collectivist enterprise in which all power is vested in a small number of central planning bureaucrats at the top and the individual must surrender their autonomy to serve the interests of the planning authority.
- death tax /dɛθ taks/ n. when, upon a person becoming deceased, the state declines to transfer that person’s accumulated freedom-unit score to a different, arbitrary person who did not earn those freedom-units.
- disruption /dɪsˈrʌpʃn/ n. changing an industry standard by finding ways to pay people less for their labor.
- education /ɛdjʊˈkeɪʃ(ə)n/ n. the process of being filtered for employment based on one’s pliability and deference.
- employment /ɪmˈplɔɪm(ə)nt/ n. being granted permission to continue living in exchange for an adjustable daily quantity of toil.
- entitlements /ɪnˈtʌɪt(ə)lmənts/ n. small increases in the freedom-units afforded to the elderly, sick, and those who have too few units to survive.
- eviction /ɪˈvɪkʃ(ə)n/ n. forcible removal from one’s home for failure to provide the appropriate lord with sufficient tribute.
- fighter plane /ˈfʌɪtə pleɪn/ n. a plane that fights other planes to the death.
- fiscal responsibility /ˈfɪsk(ə)l rɪˌspɒnsɪˈbɪlɪti/ n. only spending money on things that kill people.
- food stamps /fuːd stamp/ n. a system by which the poor must humiliate themselves on a six-monthly or yearly basis in order to buy a tiny amount of food they will be shamed for possessing. (Use of the stamp for lobster will result in congressional hearings.)
- fossil fuel /ˈfɒs(ə)l fjuː(ə)l/ n. a suicide pill; brings gratification of immediate pleasures but causes death to one’s self and one’s offspring.
- genocide /ˈdʒɛnəsʌɪd/ n. something white people fear will happen to them; all other uses are disputed.
- health insurance board of directors /hɛlθ ɪnˈʃʊər(ə)ns bɔːd (ə)v dʌɪˈrɛktəs/ n. death panel.
- homeless person /ˈhəʊmlɪs ˈpəːs(ə)n/ n. a person we are choosing not to house in any of the X million properties currently empty.
- journalist /ˈdʒəːn(ə)lɪst/ n. a transcriptionist used by anonymous state officials to nudge public opinion in an appropriate direction.
- landlord /ˈlan(d)lɔːd/ n. precisely what it sounds like: the feudal ruler of a plot of land, entitled to extract wealth from all inhabitants.
- limited government /ˈlɪmɪtɪd ˈɡʌv(ə)nˌm(ə)nt/ n. government that restricts its role only to taking care of rich people.
